Thursday, July 20, 2017

Building Strong Marriages (Part Four)

Building Block of Well-defined Roles

There is such an attack of marriage today, that our society has re-defined the roles in marriage. The world we live in has sought to change not only the meaning of marriage but even the roles within a so called traditional marriage of a man and a woman. But what is the standard that we can build marriage on? Too bad we don’t have a marriage manual to guide us as to what the roles are within a marriage! Oh wait we do have such a manual; it is the Word of God! Let’s look at what the Bible has to say about the roles of a husband and wife.

The Role of a the Husband
The Bible tells us that the husband is the head of the wife, “I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God (1 Cor. 11:3) and again in Ephesians 5:23, “For the husband is head of the wife.” These verses have been abused in so many ways, we must have a proper understand as to what this means. It does not mean that the husband is to Lord over the wife in a dictator fashion. What it means is that He is to lead her. Headship here has nothing to do with equality; in Christ all are equal before God! Headship is about function in the divine order laid out in Scripture!

If we go back to 1 Corinthians 11:3 we read “Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman and God is the head of Christ.” Notice the order in this verse; God, Christ, man, woman. There is an order of function not an order of equality, we read in other Scriptures that the Father and Son are equal (John 10:30, 14:9, Colossians 1:15, 2:9), but we know their function is different. We see in New Testament that Son willingly submitted to the Father’s headship (John 4:34, 5:30, 6:38, Mt. 28:18). Just as the Father and Son are the same in essence and equality but have different functions in their roles so do the husband and wife!
The husband is not only to lead his wife, but he is to love his wife! A careful reading of the instructions for husbands in Ephesians 5:21-33 will show us just how we are to love our wives! Peter challenges the husband to honor his wife (1 Peter 3:1-7). Honor her by the way he treats her and by how he views her! Paul reminds us that the husband is to support and provide for his wife and family (1Timothy 5:8). Job gives us an example of a husband and a father who was the spiritual leader in his home (Job 1:1-5). This is not to be left up to the wife; it is the husband’s responsibility! 

When a husband fulfills his role the marriage is strengthen and the family is able to be a testimony for Christ! 

The Role of the wife in the Marriage
This can be a very sensitive subject in our society today! Women have been oppressed in many ways in the past and even now, but that is not biblical and it is not our intent! But it is good to look at the biblical views of the women’s role in marriage.

Submission is often seen as a dirty word today! But this word has been brought to a very high standard because the Bible tells us that the Lord Jesus Christ was submissive to the Father’s Will (Phil. 2:5-8). As we have stated submission is not about equality, it is about function! The instruction for wives to submit to their husbands is given in several places Scripture (Eph. 5:22, Col. 3:18, 1 Pet. 3:1). The word used for submit means “to arrange under.” Submission is to place oneself willingly under the authority of another in keeping with the ultimate responsibility you have under Christ. 

Peter also instructs wives to respect their husbands (1 Pet. 3:1-6) and Paul also mentions the need of respect in Ephesians 5:33. In Titus 2:3-4 we read that older women are to admonish the younger women to love their husbands. It goes on there to describe the role of a wife and mother as the domestic engineer! “The older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things, that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.” The word used there for homemaker is “stayer at home” or “domestically inclined.” The phrase “manage their households” in 1 Timothy 5:14, comes from a word that means “ruler of the house.” This literally means to “occupy one’s self in the management of a household.” It does not mean the women cannot work, we can read Proverbs 31 and learn of a women that was extremely busy working, but we also she managed her home as well! 

When we build our marriages according to God’s blueprints found in the Bible well will have solid marriage the will stand the test of time and the storms of life!
Tim Hadley Sr.

No comments:

Post a Comment